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Manufacturing Information Access Software System

To: All Personnel

From: President

Subject: Manufacturing Information Access Software System ("MIASS")

This memo is to announce the development of a new plant-wide software
system. We are currently building a data warehouse that will contain
all our manufacturing data. The program is referred to as the
"Manufacturing Information Access Software System" (MIASS).

Next Monday at 9:00 there will be a meeting in which I will show
MIASS.  We will continue to hold demonstrations throughout the month
so that all employees will have an opportunity to get a good look at
MIASS. As for the status of the implementation of the program, I have
not addressed the networking aspects, so currently only one person can
be in MIASS at a time. This should change as MIASS expands.

Several people are using the program already and have come to depend
on it. Just this morning, I walked into a subordinate's office and was
not surprised to find that he had his nose buried in MIASS. I've
noticed that some of the less technical personnel, however, are
somewhat afraid of MIASS.

Just last week, when asked to enter some information into the program,
I had a secretary say to me, "I'm a little nervous, I've never put
anything in MIASS before."  I volunteered to help her through her
first time.  When we were through, she admitted that it was relatively
painless and she was actually looking forward to doing it again. She
went so far as to say that, after using SAP and Oracle, she was ready
to kiss MIASS.

I know there are concerns over the virus that was found in MIASS upon
initial installation, but I am pleased to say the virus has been
eliminated and we were able to save MIASS. In the future, however,
protection will be required prior to entering MIASS.

We planned this database to encompass all information associated with
the business.  So, as you begin using the program, feel free to put
anything you want into MIASS. As MIASS grows larger, we envision a
time when it will  be commonplace to walk by an office and see a
hand a paper to an employee and say, "Here, stick this in MIASS."

This program has already demonstrated great benefit to the company
during recent OSHA, ISO 9000 and EPA audits.  After requesting certain
historical data, the agency representatives were amazed at how quickly
we provided the information.

When asked how the numbers could be retrieved so rapidly, our
Environmental Manager proudly stated, "Simple, I just pulled them out
of MIASS."

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